{"id":162,"date":"2014-05-03T10:11:02","date_gmt":"2014-05-03T14:11:02","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.beydeckard.com\/blog\/?page_id=162"},"modified":"2014-08-11T21:31:30","modified_gmt":"2014-08-12T01:31:30","slug":"poison-for-your-troubles","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/beydeckard.com\/blog\/beys-tales\/poison-for-your-troubles\/","title":{"rendered":"Poison for your Troubles"},"content":{"rendered":"

My thoughts always smell of blood and promises - mental blades to slice everything into neat piles, always cutting, sorting, removing the fat.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m smart. Smarter than you. Yet, you are the one who sees the fatigue before I do. Who sees that the razors have gone astray and cut too much. You see it when my heart pounds too quick, and my veins turn to stripped wire.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s always tea, you offer. An old joke from our salad days.<\/p>\n

You never take a goddamn thing seriously! Thinking to make me laugh only gets you my anger\u2026 but I fuck you by the window so I can feel the sun upon my skin, and all is right again when our bodies lie love-slick and used.<\/p>\n

Too serious, you say. And I kiss you.<\/p>\n

Even on a good day, it hurts you how my soul reaches for the darkness in you, that I won\u2019t be happy until I coax it out to play - to smell-touch-taste\u2026\u00a0fuck<\/em> it. But you let me dig anyhow and smile through the pain.<\/p>\n

This is heartache, sweetheart, and I will drown<\/em> you in it just to get my lips wet.<\/p>\n

Oh you hush me and cluck at my bleakness, and you finally get your smile. You always do.<\/p>\n

And you get to live another day with me warm in your arms, the tangle of trust in our limbs. The blades slip back into place as you close my eyes with your kiss.<\/p>\n

You heal me - I cut you. Such a beautiful thing.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s a poisonous dance we do, you and I, but oh how we do it so well.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

My thoughts always smell of blood and promises – mental blades to slice everything into neat piles, always cutting, sorting, removing the fat. I\u2019m smart. Smarter than you. Yet, you are the one who sees the fatigue before I do. Who sees that the razors have gone astray and cut too much. You see it when my heart pounds too quick, and my veins turn to stripped wire. It\u2019s always tea, you offer. An old joke from our salad days. You never take a goddamn thing seriously! Thinking to make me laugh only gets you my anger\u2026 but I fuck … <\/p>\n

Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":475,"parent":125,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","template":"","meta":{"generate_page_header":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-162","page","type-page","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail"],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/P4sexs-2C","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":597,"url":"https:\/\/beydeckard.com\/blog\/fuck-limits\/","url_meta":{"origin":162,"position":0},"title":"Fuck Limits","author":"Bey","date":"September 20, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"On my knees, trembling\u00a0from the adrenaline coursing through my blood, I keep my eyes on you. You shake your head, the pieces of the wooden ruler you broke against my skin clutched in your hand. \u201cWhen are you going to use your safeword?\u201d you ask. \u201cProbably never,\u201d I reply. \u201cBut\u2026","rel":"","context":"In \"BDSM\"","block_context":{"text":"BDSM","link":"https:\/\/beydeckard.com\/blog\/tag\/bdsm\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/beydeckard.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/09\/BatmanArkhamCity.jpg?fit=440%2C299&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":125,"url":"https:\/\/beydeckard.com\/blog\/beys-tales\/","url_meta":{"origin":162,"position":1},"title":"Bey’s Tales","author":"Bey","date":"May 1, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"A collection of stories and poems and WIPs. Some are true, some are partially true, and some are complete fabrication. Most are either NC-17 or just rather dark. You've been warned. Bronze (\ud83d\udfe0) and Silver (\u26aa\ufe0f) subscription tiers are required for some linksRead about subscription options here Serials\/WIPs These are\u2026","rel":"","context":"In \"BDSM\"","block_context":{"text":"BDSM","link":"https:\/\/beydeckard.com\/blog\/tag\/bdsm\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":167,"url":"https:\/\/beydeckard.com\/blog\/beys-tales\/safe\/","url_meta":{"origin":162,"position":2},"title":"Safe","author":"Bey","date":"May 3, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"I am safe. This is what I tell myself. I am safe and there is nothing in there. Yet, my eyes find their way back to the closet, trying to see through the cheap wooden door to the very back. The darkest corner. Where it might be. 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His grandmother\u2019s big uncovered veranda was just perfect for soaking in the sun before he had to return\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/beydeckard.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/10\/Christos-and-the-Mist.jpg?fit=1200%2C750&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/beydeckard.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/10\/Christos-and-the-Mist.jpg?fit=1200%2C750&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/beydeckard.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/10\/Christos-and-the-Mist.jpg?fit=1200%2C750&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/beydeckard.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/10\/Christos-and-the-Mist.jpg?fit=1200%2C750&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/beydeckard.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/10\/Christos-and-the-Mist.jpg?fit=1200%2C750&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":15463,"url":"https:\/\/beydeckard.com\/blog\/rakka-surprise\/","url_meta":{"origin":162,"position":4},"title":"Rakka Surprise","author":"Bey","date":"May 11, 2023","format":false,"excerpt":"(originally published in Uncommon Lands) Easing back on the thrust, I squinted at the landing zone far below me on the planet's surface. Something weird was going on. If I turned my head one way, the black square seemed to rise up into the air. If I turned it the\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":5079,"url":"https:\/\/beydeckard.com\/blog\/buy-my-books\/my-roommate-kevin\/","url_meta":{"origin":162,"position":5},"title":"My Roommate, Kevin","author":"Bey","date":"February 7, 2023","format":false,"excerpt":"My Roommate, Kevin (novella (?) WIP)CW\/Themes: Odd couple, love story, annoyance to lovers, opposites attract, slob\/neat, misunderstanding Chapter 1 \u2013 The Stranger \u201cHi. I\u2019m here about the room.\u201d JP stood blinking slowly at the stranger in his doorway, not sure how to reply. 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